Sunday, October 29, 2006

Tears on the Face

I guessed as much. This day will come. Have brought disappointment and now have a whole lot of people to face and explain the painful details all over till time washes this away. But I guess this was best for me. Call me selfish, but I just wanted to remember the best. Along this journey, I have been far too absorbed in the lack of faith in recent times that I unknowingly forget the joy it has once brought to me. To leave now would be the best timing. It wouldn't affect the big picture much and I wouldn't have to continue suffering from the weariness. I know there's an ember of passion somewhere within. And sometimes people say, man only treasures something after he has lost it. Maybe it's the case for me now. I want to regain my Passion. Even if it means losing it. At the very least my subtle sadness now tells me that I am a player through and through. Or so I think.

I haven't the least idea what's going through me now.

Monday, October 23, 2006

The Blinding White

As each day passes, my mind sees more. But as time slips pass like sand sliding from my balled-up hands, my eyes see less and less. The Blinding White sometime scares me.

It could take away possibly everything from me. When I walked pass some beautiful blooming striking red flowers dotted on this whole bush of dark, handsome greenery along the streets yesterday, I have no idea why, but I nearly cried. The sight just made me feel so free as if I own the world. It made me feel remembered. Or rather, it made me remember the bright side this world could offer.

I will lose everything if I lose Sight.

White like you can see nothing.

Monday, October 16, 2006


因为伤心时只会哭, 但想哭时却哭不出。觉得自己好无助,无奈,仿佛像废人似的,没用。泪水好可贵。它得来不易。就当失落,沮丧时,只有发泄才能使我快乐。可现在什么都闷在里头,什么都做不了,什么都控制不住。就算是自己的情感也只能让天摆布。平常笑,都似乎好虚假。我现在就好象只需那几颗泪水的小珠子。让它们为我擦亮眼睛,把世界看得更清楚。



Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Autumn is here

Taking a photo is like being God. You can make that one moment come to a complete standstill. You finally can dictate something. This god, however, is seemingly flawed. That moment of stillness can never be adequately portrayed. Memories will flow back when we look at a photo. But we can never relive the moment. And memories will fade with the wash of time.

Look out of the bus window. It seems as if the world stopped rotating for you. Just when you feel down and dejected, you are comforted by the thought that the world cares for you.

As the bus journey continues, you pass familiar places. Then you think again. And realise, that nothing has very much changed. The world didn't wait. Earth did not stop. You are plunged into a whole pool of impugnment. Who are you to ask for interim ?

Autumn is here. How beautifully the leaves grow old. How full of light and color their last days. Last days. I love the leaves, I don’t know why. Is it their colors or how they fly? They crunch and crinkle, under my feet. I pile them up and take a leap! You crunch and crinkle under agony. We are our own god and in every way, we are flawed.

It's time to get drunk with sorrow.

Who am I to plead for time-out ?

Monday, October 02, 2006

If You Can See

There's so much to tell but I see no reason in explaining. The explaining can never be enough. It can never be precise.

"Just follow your heart and pursue your dreams." It sounds so easy. But it takes tons of courage.

If you can see what the world has in place for you. Life will be so much easier.

Only if I could see.